Talking to Your Child About Therapy: A Parent’s Guide
As parents, you want your child to feel safe, supported, and understood — especially when they’re working through challenges with a St. Louis counselor. Whether your child has just started counseling or has been attending for a while, knowing how to talk with them about their experience can make a big difference.
At Compassionate Counseling St. Louis, we often hear from parents wondering about how to know if counseling is working. This is why our St. Louis therapist team at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis practices feedback-informed treatment, uses evidenced-based approaches like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and includes frequent parent check-ins as a part of each treatment plan.
And we want you to feel supported talking to your kids at home about their counseling experience. So today we are sharing with you some tips to help guide those important conversations.
Image Credit: Vitaly Gariev @silverkblack
1. Start With Openness and Curiosity
Kids often take cues from their parents. If you approach counseling as something normal and positive, they’re more likely to feel the same way. You might say something like:
“I’m glad you have someone to talk to who’s there just for you. How’s that been going for you?”
“I’m really glad that you have someone you can really talk to. What has it been like having someone to open up to?”
Keep your tone curious but not prying - the goal is to open the door, not to push them through it.
2. Respect Their Privacy
Counseling is their space. Depending on your child’s age and personality, they may or may not want to share details about what they discuss. That’s okay and that is normal.
You can reassure them by saying:
“You don’t have to tell me everything you talk about — that’s between you and your counselor. But if there’s anything you want to share, I’m here to listen.”
“You deserve a place where you can speak freely, and that’s what your counselor is for. But if you ever want to share anything with me, I’m always here to listen.”
Respecting boundaries helps your child feel safe and in control of their own therapy process.
3. Focus on Feelings, Not Facts
Instead of asking for a play-by-play of what happened in their session, try focusing on emotions:
“How did you feel after your session today?”
“Was there anything that felt hard or helpful?”
4. Normalize Counseling
Remind your child that talking to a counselor doesn’t mean something is “wrong” with them. You can say:
“A lot of people talk to counselors — even adults. It’s just another way to take care of your mind and heart.”
“Lots of people of all ages see counselors. It’s just another way to care for yourself and get the support you deserve.”
When counseling is presented as a normal part of life, it helps remove stigma and encourages openness.
5. Stay Involved Without Taking Over
If your child’s counselor shares feedback or suggests ways to support therapy at home, do your best to follow through. Small, consistent steps — like creating calm routines, creating a peaceful bedtime routine, validating feelings, or practicing coping skills together — show that you’re part of their support team.
6. Model What You Hope to See
Kids learn emotional openness from what they observe. Talk about your own healthy coping strategies, like:
“When I’m feeling stressed, I like to take a walk or talk to someone I trust.”
“When I’m having a tough day, I try to pause and do something calming, like listening to music or stepping outside for fresh air.”
“If I’m feeling upset, it helps me to talk things through with someone I trust or take a quiet moment for myself.”
Modeling vulnerability and self-care helps your child understand that emotions are normal and manageable.
Support for Your Parenting Journey
Parenting is filled with joy, growth, and tough moments. Our parent coaches are here to help you build confidence, connection, and calm as you guide your family through life’s ups and downs.
Whether you’re managing big feelings, daily struggles, or simply looking to grow your parenting skills, we’re here to support you every step of the way.
Learn More About Our Approach at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis
Outcomes Focused Anxiety Therapy at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis: At Compassionate Counseling St. Louis, we know that every child's journey is unique, which means their treatment in therapy should be too. That's why we use Feedback Informed Treatment, an evidence-based approach that allows us to tailor our therapy to your child's unique needs.
Why Do You Play With Kids? Using Play Therapy Interventions at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis: When kids struggle with anxiety, anger, big emotions, or trauma, they often can’t explain what’s wrong. But through play, they show us. Play gives us a window into your child’s world. It gives your child the tools to express their emotions, develop self-awareness, and build coping strategies - without needing to put it all into words.
Why One-Size-Fits-All CBT Doesn’t Work—And How We Do It Differently at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis: At Compassionate Counseling St. Louis, we believe CBT should never be a one-size-fits-all solution. Instead, we tailor therapy to each child, teen, or young adult we work with at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis. Our therapists use CBT in a way that makes sure our clients thoughts, emotions, and experiences are truly heard.
Looking for a parenting coach in St. Louis?: As anxiety therapists in St. Louis, we know how anxiety in kids and teens can often exacerbate the anxiety we experience as parents….Maybe you notice your own symptoms of anxiety in your kids, such as your anxious perfectionism tendencies, your fear of judgement from others, your tendency towards making mountains out of molehills. You want to help your kid - but you’re dealing with your own feelings of guilt as well.
Child & Teen Therapy at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis
Interested in getting more support for your child, teen or yourself? We would love to talk more with you about what has been going on and how the St. Louis therapists and St. Louis parent coaches at Compassionate Counseling St. Louis can help. Schedule a free 15 minute consultation call to learn more and get started.
Curious to learn more about St. Louis counseling for anxiety and anxiety-driven anger? Reach out to us at hello@compassionatecounselingstl.com. As child anxiety experts, we love working with kids, teens, college students and parents to help manage their anxiety, stress, and anger. Compassionate Counseling St. Louis is located in Clayton, MO and works with families throughout St. Louis City, St. Louis County, Ladue, University City, Town and Country, Webster Groves, Creve Couer, Kirkwood, Richmond Heights, and Brentwood. We also provide online therapy Missouri wide to teens and college students. You can set up your first free consult on this website, on our consultation page.